Food In Liquid Form

Anheuser-Bush's Malt-NutrineStarting in the late 1800s, many breweries produced "food tonics," malt beverages containing around 2% alcohol that were promoted as "food in liquid form," aiding in digestion, increasing appetite and aiding in sleep. "A boon to nursing mothers."

from www.pharmacytechs.net/blog/old-school-medicine-ads/

Politics Explained

Politics Explained
FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all of the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.
BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and put them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs as the regulations say you need.
FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.
PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.
RUSSIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.
CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The government takes both of them and shoots you.
DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.
PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.
REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.
BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.
PURE ANARCHY: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.
LIBERTARIAN/ANARCHO-CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
(Original source unknown . . . this version expanded and Illuminated by SJ.)

Hard Times Optical Illusion

HardTime :: Illusion from ze frank on Vimeo.

Yippie Aye Kai Yay it is a Cowgirl!!!

Ron English CowGirl in SloMo from William Zoe FitzGerald on Vimeo.

Shigataganai

Shigataganai. That is a Japanese word. It is kind of fun to say really. Break it down to sylables. Shi-ga-ta-ga-nai. Keep the intonation flat, give each sylable equal length and stress. Now say it Shi Ga Ta Ga Nai. Feels good in the back of your throat, doesn't it? Now, what it means. It means "It cannot be helped." "Que Sera Sera" "What will be will be." You can believe things happen for no reason what so ever. You can figure that they happen for a specific purpose. You can believe that all is random, chance, that is really doesn't make a damn bit of difference one way or the other. You might be the one that stands in the middle of the street with the rain pouring buckets down on your head screaming, "WHY ME? WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS!" I think things happen for a reason. You know, a place for everything, a thing for every place. For instance, you are standing in line at your local supermarket. You aren't in any particular hurry, but you don't want to stand in line all day. There is an odd old lady in front of you. She is wearing a shaggy, dirty coat and carried a monstrous old purse. Has one thing on the counter, you have two, in the back of your head, you think that your are nearly outta here and on your way to where ever it is you happen to be going. That is when it happens. She has a total of a dollar and seven cents. That is when she starts digging in this huge bag for change. At first it is a quarter, then a dime, a nickel of two, then suddenly, she is pulling out pennies. One at a time. STOP!, I'LL PAY FOR IT! JUST MOVE! But you don't. You stand there, getting hotter and more pissed by the clink of each penny on the counter. Here is where Shigataganai comes into play. It cannot be helped. Maybe, just maybe, this extra minute, maybe ninety seconds that holds you up could be doing one of two things. One, when you leave the supermarket, jump into your car and get stuck at all the lights before you can get on the highway and off to where ever the hell it was that you were headed to, you missed the big guy driving the Volkswagen mini-bus who dropped his cell phone, and bent down to pick it up, swerving over the center line just where you would have been ninety seconds ago. Whew! That old lady with the bag of pennies just saved your life! And you were pissed at her! Imagine that! Or, on the the second thing that could happen. You get in line in front of the old lady, you rush out the door of the supermarket and run right into a gang banger heading into the market. You piss him off, and he pounds the shit out of you. Now think about it. Did the old lady save your life, or because she got held up by someone who was trying to help her decide which can of Campbell's Cream of Mushroom Soup was the freshest, the reason you got your ass kicked? Everything is so easy to understand in retrospect. You just have to remember tho, don't think about it too much, you'll start to analyze everything. Just remember one thing. Shigataganai.

Some Observations By Great People

He may be mad, but there's method in his madness. There nearly always is method in madness. It's what drives men mad, being methodical.
G. K. Chesterton, The Fad of the Fisherman (1922)English author & mystery novelist (1874 - 1936)
There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.
Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900), "On Reading and Writing"

Truly great madness cannot be achieved without significant intelligence.
Henrik Tikkanen

Whos on First

This is one of the funniest skits ever written. It was performed by Abbot and Costello many years ago, but it will still make you hurt yourself laughing every time you hear it.