Life Lesson # 937.2 A

Always check for toilet paper before you sit down.

Anarchy?

Anarchy has more than one definition. Some use the term "anarchy" to refer to a society without a publicly enforced government or violently enforced political authority.^[1][2] When used in this sense, anarchy may^[3] or may not^[4] be intended to imply political disorder or lawlessness within a society.
Others, including most individuals who self-identify as anarchists, use the term to imply a system of governance, mostly theoretical at a nation state level. There are also other forms of anarchy that attempt to avoid the use of coercion, violence, force and authority, while still producing a productive and desirable society.^[5][6] Anarchy is also a technical issue of economic science.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anarchy

      Anarchy appears to have arrived in Washington DC.  Obstructionism and infighting on the part of the GOP and the divided Republican party have become the norm. Doing nothing in favor of selfish political interests to keep a useless position in the political agenda is what has become the norm for the right. The radical far leaning rightest neo-cons have taken minority control of the House and are intent on emphasizing the highly vocal lunatic fringe of the right. Anyone with common sense knows that this is a non-productive and dangerous sidetrack to a healthy government.

    

 

Like a fish

     I am seriously disabled when it comes to numbers. I have always have had a very difficult time with them from the very beginning. I found that I have a condition known as "dyscalculia", it is similar to dyslexia in that the numbers transpose. Many times I look at a set of numbers and it might as well be one big hairball that my cat has hacked up. No start, no middle and no end, just a complicated puzzle of lines that have no meaning to me. I know my Social Security Number and I know my driver's license number. I have my phone number down and can tell you what it is. If I write it down for you, you gotta double check, I'll transpose something.  I have no trouble with letters, I excel at words. It is a cruel joke that nature has played upon me.
     I had to go to the bank today and talk about some finances I have. I generally forget all about them, they sit quietly in the bank an do whatever finances do in their spare time. When I am forced to confront them though, I am terrified. When I was talking to my financial guy today, I felt like he was the principal and I was once again forced to stay after school and practice the numbers till I got them right.
     Once,  I was asked to stop at the supermarket by a friend to pick up a box of tampons. I was fine until I walked into the aisle of the "Feminine Hygiene" department. Suddenly, I was faced with a choice of petite, regular and large. Heavy and light days, liners with wings, liners with out wings, easy plastic applicators or natural lubricant applicators. I had never in my life been so out of my element as that day. I mean a man cannot really explain that type of situation to anyone, much less himself.
       I also guess that the another way to describe the way numbers affect me is like buying a bra.  As a male, I am quite sure of what goes inside a bra.  I am, or was at one time, quite adept at unhooking them with both hands, left hand, right hand, fastened in the back or fastened in the front, even those with no fasteners.  I was a bra master. But, if for some reason I was chosen to go buy a bra, I would only  know the basics. The problems start when I try to guess how it is supposed to fit, you know, putting the peddle to the metal, to where the rubber meets the road so to speak. I am totally out of my element. I know what all the basic moves, but I cannot put what I know to the task at hand.
     That is the way it is for numbers and me. Some things just aren't supposed to happen.

Silly Season and Sick of It

      The politics have gotten to me.  For the last 3 weeks or so, I have been totally fed up with the news and how dirty this year is. I have never seen it this dirty before, and  I have seen it get pretty dirty before.
       Even Facebook has gotten so partisan it is not fun anymore. People that I thought were my friends put things up that are totally offensive ideologically. I never thought I could be at odds with so many people on so many levels. It used to be Republican or Democrat, not is is Libertarian, Totaltarian, Sectarian, Hate-tarian, and anything else you can hook a label to.
        I feel if I need to create some sort of political know-it-all form of blog just to stay on top of shit.
I'll be back after I have considered my options. Currently I have two choices. Lobotomy or suicide.

How to Give a Cat A Pill

How to Give a Cat a Pill:
1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby.
Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa.
Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand.; Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe.
Call spouse in from the garden.
6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws-Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth.
Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail.
Get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.
8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with
head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans and drink one beer to take taste away. Apply band-aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed.
Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard, and close door onto neck, to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on
hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw tee-shirt away and fetch new
one from bedroom.
12. Call fire department to retrieve the #$%^&* cat from the top of the
tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into
fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.
13. Using heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed, tie the little *&#%^'s front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically
and pour two pints of water down throat to wash pill down.
14. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room. Sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.
15. Arrange for RSPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and call
local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.

How To Give A Dog A Pill:

1. Wrap it in bacon.
2. Toss it in the air.
3: Done!
Thanks Anja.

Observation of the Veterans Administration Police

     I have begun to have an at least once a month pilgramage to The West Los Angeles Veterans Hospital on Santa Monica Blvd in West LA. I had been given transportation to the Salvation Army's "Haven", a VA campus Emergency Overnight housing due to a mix-up with my overnight stay at the hospital. (I have to ride a bus from Santa Maria to WLO, a one way ride of around 4 hours. Often, the clinics I must attend are on different days, so I must stay at a motel provided by the Veteran's Administration.)
     I was riding in a van, driven by a Veteran that has a job driving one of the many vans on the rather large hospital campus. The VA Police rushed by with lights flashing and siren screaming. The driver told me, "You know, this security forsce are over zealous men. They are scared cops that over react ot any threat real or imagined. They are scared because they know that with all the Veterans they have to deal with suffer from PTSD, and anyone of them, any age or physical ability are seasoned warriors. At any time, they could run into a little old guy with the power or means to take them out in the blink of an eye. These guys are just plain paranoid. You know what though? They should be paranoid. Some of these guys are just plain crazy.

The New Politics

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

          Mitt is swearing that he’s gonna win, Santorum does win, Ron Paul keeps his happy little group and Gingrich winds up finishing third. This is just an example of how screwed up the Republican Party is. They have been so focused on screwing Obama, they haven’t bothered to keep their own house clean. Talk about cutting off your nose and throwing out the baby, these guys are doing to themselves what they’ve been trying to do to the Democrats. I have a huge worry that by some chance enough Republicans get into office due their hatred or racial prejudice by default. Hate Obama, find a name with an (R) in front of it and vote blindly and without thought of the consequences. 

          A country that has been the optimum of finding a compromise for the good of the majority is now frightened and duped into being sheeple. I recall when there were differences between a Right and a Left. Now the Right is so far to the Right, it is ready to fall off the edge, and they are dragging the ones who were on the Left into the gutter of the Right.  To be Liberal anymore is as bad as being a mental case was 20 years ago. We suffer the chance of plunging into a “small government” that wants to be so small they want to make sure that you don’t have any rights if you don’t agree with their principals exactly. They want to be “small” enough that they want to go into your bedroom and condemn you for having sex for enjoyment rather than only for reproduction.   They want to be so “small” that they can determine that your right to pursue happiness is only adhered to by their “small minds”.

          Why are these people who want to keep a “small” Government are so small minded that they cannot accept the fact that marriage is for love and not as a testament as to how Christian you are. Last time I looked, the Ten Commandments had been tossed aside by Jesus and replaced with  simply “Love your neighbor as you would love yourself. Just what in hell are they trying to do? This is the 21^st  Century, and they want to plunge us back into the 1950s.